The Not So Perfect Life!

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

The Joy of Friendship

Well, it has been some time since ive been on here and i guess its for some pretty good reasons! I am loving life and enjoying school. For once im starting to feel things click into place. It has been forever since i have felt like this. I finally feel like i am in the fight place at the right time. Although i still feel like maybe im nervous to admit that i gave up on the pharmacy dream nursing just feels like a better fit and seeing how spanish and other thinngs are playing into what i have going makes me confident in my decision. Ive also come to learn that right now my friends that i have are the worlds best friends and i dont know what i would do without them supporting me and standing behind me. I know that they are they for me no matter what, and that im there for them. I love that i can act like myself in front of them and have no shame of who i am and i dont need to feel the need to keep things all to myself. I hope God has them in my plans down the road. But for now im going to live in the now, studying for the 16 credits im in, the 15 hours i work, and loving my friends and life that are outside of this busy world, because if you arent happy wtih who you have in your life then know that god is taking them out becuase they have taught you all things that were necessary and now its time to move on to bigger and better things! :) Until later have a happy fall! :))) 

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

                                                                 Broken....

Well these past few days have been overwhelmingly unreal and confusing. I as a 20 year old shouldnt have to feel the way i do. Its been 3 years since i have felt this uncanny sense of  insecurity in the house! I think in my mind i had this just absolute picture that everything was magically going to fix itself and then when i actually think about it, he cant and he wont. You think that life is 10000000 times better when the other one will be home but in reality he isnt going to bring the sun on rainy days he may just infact bring more rainy days. Finding out that this woman, or bitch what ever my mood brings is selfish and doesnt realize shes breaking up a family that was already having their wires stretched too thin. This thought and action makes my stomach hurt from anger. When i realize she talks to him more than me and my sister his own fucking flesh and blood, and to find out hes screwed everything up with my mother who is my whole entire support system and life who i would do anything for. yeah right thats some crock of crap and its not fair anymore. Its starting to make me cold and bitter towards him and almost makes me want to hate him. I shouldnt hate him hes my dad but as of right now hes not really playing that part.... it leaves me broken when i thought i was fixed.

Saturday, June 25, 2011

    I LOVE THE FARMERS MARKET...


On beautiful sunny summer days like today! Everything is so beautiful, fresh, fragrant, and oh so wonderful! The people down there are so happy, and cheerful!      I dont know if i woke up on the right side of the bed or what but sunny days with no clouds in sight and no humidity to ruin my hair makes my days even though i have to work a thousand MILLION times better! I think i need to move some where warm if i plan on enjoying this weather for the rest of my life! I mean dear Michigan you dont quite offer as much to me as Florida or even the Bahamas! 


Another thing that made my day great was Katy Perry's new song "Friday Night" if you havent heard it you should. I feel like it makes us all remember or know the feeling of a great party and waking up feeling like what the hell just happened! Its one of the best feelings ever knowing that you got to let go for just a night and waking up remembering everything you did the night before! Hoping we kept the rating a lovely PG-13 rather than an NC-17! 


Oh well, who knows maybe NC-17 is just as fun! Well im off to enjoy this beautiful sunny day! 

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Summer

Well today is June 21st, i cant believe its the first day of summer! Just one month ago I was in Florida enjoying the hot sun not having a care in the world! Which for me has probably been the first time I havent had to worry in forever so it was fabulous! Next weekend is the fourth of july and after that it seems like summer flies by and before i know it ill be moving into my first apartment and worrying about getting along with two of the four of us! They are so closed minded and are so concerned with everything! So we shall see! Maybe there's no need to be nervous but such close quarters is going to make for an interesting year!

The next thing im thinking about is oh my wonderful, smart, and just plain weird father! He thinks this new Kitty Litter is about to take off and if it does more power to him but the fact that he wants me to sell it just makes it seem like its one giant joke!! He wants me to post stuff about it but i dont feel comfortable doing it! So hey i made one post on tumblr! But i dont think im going to continue posting it!


Well have a fabulous day! im going to go and get ready for work and what not! Talk to you tomorrow!